Monday, April 02, 2007
So, yet again, tragedy struck my heart. I have it on good authority that my favourite boy* has left the capoeira gym I go to as a direct result of the incident I have come to call “Smack down 07.” I wont get into the details of his dispute with someone else at the school, mainly because they are incredibly boring.** As a result he has left the gym and I will no longer be able to gaze at his movie-star smile from across the room.
This has caused overwhelming sadness for me. I had built a meaningful relationship with this guy. I always smiled at him and he would smile back (sometimes I would get a little bit mesmerized while watching him warm-up. He may have known that I was into him). I found out his name and complimented his athletic skill, which is tremendous. Also, I got as far as asking him where he hangs out as a good friend of mine suggested that I say something to him that required more of a response than ‘yes’ ‘no’ or ‘thank you.’ It was great advice, and I had followed it. I had planned to start with “When you are going out, where do you normally go?” and then move on to something more substantial, like “I could love you and make your life like an eternal spring.” But the day I asked him where he liked to go out (no, I did not say, “where do you go, my lovely?”) smack down 07 happened. I didn’t have the chance to go any further. After the incident I had a fast-car feeling. He looked upset about it and I wanted to suggest that he and I get in his car and just start driving, driving in his car, we could speed so fast, I’d feel like I was drunk, city lights lay out before us and his arm would feel nice wrapped round my shoulder. I have a feeling I could be someone. You know what I mean.
It took me a month to get to this point. Now that time is wasted. The worst part about it is that when I asked him where he likes to go out, he said that he has no regular place. I can’t even find him. It is especially tragic because a friend of mine and I have imposed a date deadline. By April 30th we must have a date, or have a date planned with a real person of the opposite sex. It may be completely irrational to put some arbitrary deadline on these kinds of things, but strict rationality is for boring people.
The only option open to me is to go to the other capoeira groups in the city and look for him. But, that is more than a little bit psycho, so I wont do that. Who am I going to have a crush on now?
*While my dedication to my instructor is still strong, I am not so crazy as to actually make him the sole object of my desire. Plus, the last time I saw him he was wearing these ridiculous gigantic black-jogging pants – in public. This makes me wonder if he got kicked in the head and is, perhaps, a little punch-drunk.
**Basically the only thing that would make it interesting is if a woman was involved or something. Like someone got someone else’s wife pregnant. However, this is not the case. Sorry.