Prattle on
Tuesday, October 04, 2005
So, last night I had the strangest dream I’d never dreamed before (for those of you who didn’t spend time at Holy Redeemer Catholic School in Pickering, that was a quote from an anti war hymn we used to sing. I think it was taught to us by an ex-hippie teacher. We sang it a lot. I am not sure if hymn is the right word as I don’t think it mentions God or Jesus or Mary. Although, I don’t remember the song in it’s entirety, so it may).

I dreamed that I was in a “The Bachelor” like reality TV show. I believe the Batchelor crept it’s way into my sub conscious because just before bed I was chatting with someone on the phone about the show for some reason. Earlier in the day I had heard “The Copa Cabana” by Barry Manlow and that song also featured in the dream. I know what you are thinking, that’s a lot of camp for one night. In any case I was a contestant on a show that taped people on dates and throughout their relationships. We all had to assume fake names. I chose Lola. Why not, she was a showgirl and she got to wear yellow feathers. Anyway, I didn’t get to see my relationship on tape because the whole world was enraptured by one couple. It was this older blond woman with terrible eye makeup from Coronation Street (the woman who plays Liz Mcdonald – Beverly Callard – she is Steve’s mom and I think she wants him to get back together with Tracey Barlow even though she is a bit of a bitch, but she’s the mother of his child and he got rid of Karen. There is no reason to be alone, I guess). She was paired with none other than former President Bill Clinton. In the years since his presidency he has come to resemble a Coronation Street character complete with white tank top, a silver chain and pallid complexion, I think he even drove a cab, but he still had that voice and his hair was that perfect helmet of grey that for some reason didn’t detract from his overwhelming sex appeal.

Their relationship was really passionate but a bit rocky and in the end she decided to end it. Bill was devastated. In the scene where she dumped him, Bill just kept telling her that he didn’t understand and kept asking why. It was pretty charged. A little later Liz Mcdonald/Beverly Callard sat alone in the pub, Rovers Return, over a pint reminiscing and crying.

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