Prattle on
Friday, October 07, 2005
So, this morning I saw Rob Lowe’s naked ass. I was at the gym and on the televisions right near the cardio machines was the 1986 classic “Youngblood.” Yes, set in Hamilton, Youngblood is the story of a young man wanting to play minor league hockey along with several local tough guys. The film is beautifully Canadian. I think they even drink EX in the classic 1986 bottles.

I saw Rob’s ass (I think the next time his ass was on tape involved a 13 year old, a hotel room in New Orleans during Mardi Gras and several glasses of the local brew) because there is a lovely scene where he goes walking down a hallway wearing nothing but a jock strap and hockey stick. Cynthia Gibb who is only good looking by 1986 standards catches him in the hall. The sound was off, but I pretty sure she is the coach’s daughter. Of course she is, it wouldn’t make any sense in film language otherwise.

The best thing about the movie is that the people who made it actually expect you to believe that Rob Lowe could play hockey. He looks like he weighs about 12 pounds. He is positively skinny. Meanwhile, his co-star has one of the most beautiful bodies to ever grace the silver screen. Yes, folks the great Patrick Swayze is topless for at least 30 minutes. And once, all slick and sweaty, he lifts heavy things in the gym.

The film also features a young local favourite. Keanu Reeves, three years before his landmark roles of Bill or Ted (I’m not sure which), Neo and Buddha, he appears as a hockey player. Although clearly skinnier than even Rob Lowe, Reeves plays a kid who insists on wearing a t-shirt emblazoned with ‘Laval.’ I am real sorry the sound was off on the TV, because I am pretty sure he is supposed to be French Canadian. Imagine. He really was always beautiful.

As I ran I watched about 40 minutes of the movie. There were 4 women in it. Two of them may well have been credited as “Puck Bunnies in the Bar.” One of them was the aforementioned Cynthia Gibb (Of course Rob Lowe get into bed with her) and an older woman who runs the boarding hose he lives in, who Rob Lowe also sleeps with. Apparently the women in Hamilton are over the moon for the local minor league hockey player.

I have to say, I LOVED IT.

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