Thursday, March 01, 2007
So, last night a friend of mine and I were chatting on the way home from the gym when she told me the most ridiculous story. It wasn’t a long story. Well, it was more of a statement. She told me that on Thursday’s her boyfriend – who happens to be real nice looking – goes with her to the YMCA to take African dance class and he loves it*. The class is called “expressions African.” I am afraid to go to it due to the possibility that half the class may actually be the Tam tam girls who think they can do African dance to an ill-conceived drum beat under the July sun on Mt. Royal.
Anyway, this dude goes to a dance class with his girlfriend and he loves it. From what she tells me the class is an intense work out, and she suspects that is why he likes it so much. Whatever the reason, I can’t believe that guy is doing this, and I really want to see it.
I wondered for a few minutes where she found this lovely guy. Then I remembered they are from Alberta. I have had the opinion, for a while now, that in Alberta they raise their boys properly. Everyone wants a good Alberta boy. Everyone I know, who has an Albertan for a boyfriend has a wonderful guy.
It seems that there are a few traits to the good Alberta boys that makes them so, well, good. First, Albertans like to be employed, this puts them heads and tails above many of the available Montreal boys. Second, Alberta boys tend to be strapping farm lads and lead healthy lifestyles. Their manliness becomes them. The Vancouver pot-heads are generally to lazy for that. Third, the Albertan male seems to like companionate relationships. This trait is increasingly hard to find in the Toronto – and Montreal – male.
One key to the perfect Albertan boyfriend is that they have moved out of Alberta and probably will never move back. These Albertans, raised with all the above qualities also enjoy life in the country’s more, shall we say, spontaneous urban centres.
I really think that I should start some sort of “Date an Albertan” web site. It can run along side my “Date a publishing executive” site**. There must be thousands more Albertan boys who want out of Alberta, they just need a great reason, why not some charming non-Albertan ladies. I am sure Albertan women are just fine, I am sure they have great personalities, but don’t you want to get a get a job and start a companionate relationship in a different place, somewhere with exciting cultural and night life? Don’t you want to experience the larger cities with a local?
The second key is that the Albertan boy actually wants to be the Albertan man. This is important because the curse of the 21st century is that adults want to be 21 for the rest of their lives as if that is the best thing you could be. Right now, I think North America is plagued with people who don’t want to grow up and make adult decisions. Many of us would rather live like we are still in a university residence. This is why the movie “Old School” was so popular. However, I think that many of us missed the end where only the looser of the group continued that lifestyle and the main character moved out of the frat house and moved on with his life.
*I have met this guy a couple times and he never fails to charm. He is one of the guys who would end up with the prefix “The lovely.” His name is Mark, so, he’d be called The Lovely Mark. He would join a select group of men including, but not limited to “The lovely Matthew,” The Lovely Alex,” “The lovely guy at the cheese store in Jean Talon Market,” “The Lovely Nordic Looking Fellow at the YMCA.” You see where I’m going with this.
**“Date a Publishing Executive” is a web site that I have been tossing around in my head. It would be geared to investment bankers or corporate lawyers, cardio-thorasic surgeons basically people who make much more money than publishing executives but want to date someone who works in media or some other cultural industry because we are great at parties and dinners. Basically, we are awesome conversationalists and that can get you some much-needed social credit that may help with career advancement. A long shot? Absolutely. Worth a try? Totally!